Dear little ants,
Did you know Spring is here? And the weather outside is just lovely. Outside, there are all kinds of fun things for you to walk across and move with your amazing ant-strength. There are flowers to smell and hills to be made.
Inside a house is where people live. Not ants. Or any buggish creatures. You are not welcome here. We like our food and want it to stay in our house. I can sweep the floor without your help. I do not want you here.
I do not know where you are coming from. But please know, without a doubt, that your presence is unwanted and your life will be cut short for no other reason than because I do not like you and I do not want you here. I will smash you. And then I will flush you down the toilet if you stay.
And if one of you invitied the mouse that I saw running across the hallway last night, I will get to the bottom of that travesty as well.
This house is a people house. Not an ant house. And most certainly not a mouse house.