Thursday, December 29, 2011

Oh my goodness... look what's become of me...

Today I happened upon a lovely little blog whilst wasting time on my newest, latest internet time waster, Pinterest. And that lovely little blog inspired me to come on over here to my own very sad, neglected blog.

So here I am, wishing I had some lovely photos of something interesting to post.

But I don't.

I do have some words to share. So we'll go with that.

I remember when the kids were little I used to be jealous of Asia and his meetings. He would complain about how many he had to go to and how boring they were. I remember thinking how nice it would be to have someone think I was important enough to invite me to participate in a meeting. I was up to my ears in laundry and diapers and bored stiff by housework. Don't get me wrong. I loved staying home with my babies - but let's be honest. It's not rocket science. And it's not overly stimulating or rewarding on a day-to-day-to-day basis. Frankly, it's boring. And repetitive. And lovely in it's own mind-numbing way.

The other night as I was getting ready for bed, I remembered that young mom who wanted to feel important to someone besides sticky toddlers.

And I realized I've become this busy, depended-upon-outside-the-home woman who has meetings and trainings and huge responsibilities in her work...

Interesting how I've ended up here - it what has essentially become what looks like a career. (Which I never aspired to... but is my current reality.)

We are hoping Asia will be able to quit his job in the next year to be able to pursue a private practice in Marriage and Family Therapy. Which means we lose benefits. Insurance. Paid vacation. Retirement.

I've been blessed with a job I absolutely adore and an opportunity to go 'full time' so I can get benefits and provide in a new way for our family while Asia branches out and follows a god-given gifting he's wanted to use for years.

And so I work. A lot. More than I ever have - or frankly, ever wanted to.

Which means I don't cook a lot of meals... or clean very well, or keep the house running very smoothly... I'm learning to manage a household and a job (and not doing a very good job of it at the moment...)

Creative pursuits are limited right now for me.

And down time is rare.

But I continue to strive for some quiet... some soul-feeding activities... some peace in the chaos.

My introverted self still really revels in home.

I've got some plans for the new year to continue to grow and thrive in my new reality... which is so very different from my past.

So stay tuned.

It's going to be an interesting ride, this next year.

I can't wait to share it with you.

(And yes - I plan to share it with you. That's part of the plan... the 2012 Cathy will blog.)

5 comments:

  1. cant wait to hear what you are thinking about doing in 2012 :*)

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  2. Cathy - love to read your blogs...

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  3. I miss your blog posts! :) But honestly, you are working more than ever, and have three children and a husband. Blogging really should not be one more "to do" but an "I want to" - :) Praying things work well for Asia and your work out of the house is stressfree! I don't think I could ever work full time again, you have my admiration!

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  4. Well, good! I like it when you write.

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  5. Love reading the honesty in your posts. I'm loving the opportunity to being able to stay at home--but it's encouraging to know I'm not the only one who finds it boring at times!

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