thoughts from the deep recesses

I did not grow up in a church that intentionally celebrated Lent. In fact, I didn't even know that Mardi Gras had any religious implications or that it was connected to the Lenten season. However, as an adult, specifically in the past 5 years or so, taking time during lent to focus my heart has become a cherished tradition for me. I find it a refreshing way to consider my faith anew... and to recognize God's ultimate sacrifice. The question each year is always: what? This year, Savannah and I have decided to become vegan. Which, yes, means that not only are we not eating meat, we aren't consuming any animal products, including dairy and eggs. Recently we watched a fascinating and compelling documentary called Forks Over Knives . The movie examines the profound claim that most, if not all, of the degenerative diseases that afflict us can be controlled, or even reversed, by rejecting animal-based and processed foods. Bold statements. Boldly presented. We weren't t...

I am a person mired deep in a need for security... and I am easily fooled into believing I have it when my circumstances appear stable. I am learning this about myself as Asia and I walk through the process of transitioning our source of income from one that's been easy and secure to one (two) that is variable and uncertain. Having lived in the same house for the first 18 years of my life with parents who avoided change, I have little experience with this sort of evolution... in the 20 years we've been married Asia and I have only moved five times. I like constancy. Security. Comfort. Stability. Now I'm being asked to trust. Trust that God will continue to provide in light of risk and instability and uncertainty. Now I know - the only reason we have had what felt like security all these years is because God has provided. Jehovah Jireh and all that. I know it intellectually. But it's darn easy to be fairly convinced that a good, secure job excludes the need for ...

This week I had a birthday. Forty three years old, I am. For some reason in my mind I have skipped a year and keep thinking I'm 44... and then I have to subtract and remind myself. It's been quite a year - my 43rd year held not only a trip to Africa with my family, but a huge milestone in personal fitness in my half marathon... two things I never would have imagined myself doing ten years ago. This year promises to be another crazy ride... The older I get, the more I study myself... striving toward growth... pushing myself into being stretched. I now find myself an 'older mom'... with the distinct privilege of encouraging and loving on younger women... sharing life on life how God has brought me through the challenges of many years of parenting. My marriage has lasted almost 20 years... and I find myself blessed to be more in love with my husband today than I ever imagined. He continues to be my best friend, greatest supporter, biggest encourager, most fav...