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Always do a strand test...

I sit here with my roots all soaked in coloring solution, making good use of my 20 minutes while the grey is turning a lovely shade of "Natural Medium Golden Brown" and the roots are being forced into matching the rest of my hair... I really hate coloring my hair, but after doing it for so long, I really have no idea what color my natural hair is. I try different boxes every time to try to match the original - Natural Medium Neutral Brown, (nope, too dark) Medium Spice, (too red) Natural Light Ash Brown, (too blah) Natural Dark Brown (yikes - way too dark...) Just when I think maybe I've found it and the finished product looks like what I imagine my natual hair color is, I see roots creeping out that refuse to match. Oh well - with the grey, I guess I'd have to do it anyway, unless I'm just going to go au naturel and let the grey reveal my age - but I'm not ready to go there. So here I sit with an itchy head, just praying that the dog stays asleep long enough for me to get the whole process completed without her moaning and whining to come out of her crate.

I slept late this morning - K. has to be at school early on Thursdays for Peer Mediating meetings - he's supposed to be there at 8:30 and I woke up at 8:26. Yikes! Fortunately he said they have granola bars and juice at the meetings and I'm just hoping he likes whatever they serve for hot lunch - there certainly wasn't time for making sandwiches. I hate those mornings when I have to drive the kids to school in my jammies - one of these days I just know I'm going to get pulled over and there I'll be, braless and slippered with sleep boogers in my eyes and death for breath... it's one of my worst fears. Fortunately it's only a few blocks - if I can get all my kids graduated without that fear ever being realized, I'll be SO happy.

Girls' Night Out tonight. We're celebrating my friend Amy's birthday. (See the motivation for coloring my hair??? Ah - it all comes together...) I'm looking forward to seeing everyone. Now that this group of friends is spread out over several church congregations, we don't get together nearly as often as we used to. As I've posted before, I feel so much more freedom to be myself in these relationships that ever before - but I still want my roots taken care of before I see them - ah, vanity...

When I posted yesterday about how old my Oregon sweatshirt was, that started a whole day of thinking about time and how absurdly fast it goes... I find myself continuously amazed that I'm even an adult, let alone that I've been one for nearly 2 decades. I mailed a birthday card to Corey today and wrote something about her being my friend for over 30 years. 30 YEARS??? Geez. That's amazing. Asia and I had a conversation with some friends recently about how old we are "in our heads." I'm about 26. Just getting settled into the adult thing, starting my family, owning my first home... still skinny and lithe... Wait - maybe I'm more like 29 - that's when I got my perky boobs (I went from a DD to a B cup for those of you who didn't have that juicy little piece of information about me...) Anyway, the point is - I'm nowhere near 40 (in my head, remember), and I'm certainly not married to a 40 year old bald man... In my brain I'm just a youngun', when fact is, I'm pushin' middle age, with kids who are growing up before my eyes and will be leaving the house in the blink of an eye... it's fascinating. I remember musing on this a lot when my grandparents died - thinking about my parents now being the eldest and my brothers and I being forced in essence, to bump up a generation. Time marches on.

Sometimes I catch a glimpse of myself in my dressing mirror and find myself thinking "Who is that woman with the granny panties and the crows feet and the sensible shoes?" (Okay, I'm just kidding about the sensible shoes...) She certainly isn't 26 (or 29) and she is a bit of a stranger to me... I learn more about her every day - and while she may not be hip, or cutting edge, she's interesting and complex and alluring in her own way. I wonder if the two will ever meld into one... that would most likely require accepting the grey hairs, so I think it'll be a bit before that happens.

Lots to think about - but for now, it's time to go get E. and my low battery warning just blipped up on the screen.

Good day to all of you - no matter your age. I love you.

Comments

  1. Don't dye your hair for me. I'll be lucky if I get mine combed.

    I'll never forget the moment (about 9 years ago) that I realized I wasn't college age anymore. I had been married for about 5 years, owned a home, taught school for a living and I went with a friend to pick up someone from a dorm. It hit me so hard that I wasn't college age anymore, I'll never forget that feeling. It was so surprising.

    I sometimes feel that way when I see moms with toddlers too, but it has never hit me that strong since. Now I feel about 29. Sometimes Danny looks at me and says, "Aren't you that girl in my math class? How did we get to be parents of grade school kids?"

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous7:25 AM

    Gals, I have some thoughts on this from the"other side of the fence" having my children raised but I just got it after I got home from teaching my Weight Watchers class
    last night and am leaving shortly to catch a plane to visit Cathy so come back to visit on Wed or Thursday and I will try to have my comments posted. (We get home on Tuesday)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous10:25 AM

    Ahhh. Sigh. I love everthing you shared. Maybe the reason is because I feel the very same way. I wrote this statement down this past summer because it resonated so deeply, "We're adults. When did that happen? And how do we make it stop?" It's a quote from one of my favorite television characters, Merideth Grey on Grey's Anatomy. I think her character summed it up nicely. Time marches on, and although we march to the beat, sometimes we want it to stop or slow down.

    Enjoy your girl's night out. Fun stuff! Way to go on the roots (hope you got the right color this time). I don't know what my real haircolor is either. I've been changing the color for over 25 years...

    ReplyDelete

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