thoughts from the deep recesses

My living room this morning...

My class reunion was so much more than I expected. Perhaps it was because I'm a softer person than I was at my 10 year reunion - but it just seemed to me that everyone there was so beautiful . I don't mean physically. Although there were plenty of physically attractive people there (I think bald men are just plain sexy - and there were OODLES of bald men.) I mean beautiful souls ... people who have been around the block a few times now. And who have weathered some hard stuff. And who are above and beyond looking to impress and who are confident in their own skins and who are able to look beyond themselves to care about others. I was overwhelmed with affection for the whole lot of them. There were quite a few with whom I had gone to school for 13 years... K - 12. And boy, did we reminisce. Good stuff. Great belly-laugh inducing memories. Of teachers. And trips. And fashion. (One guy kept saying, over and over again, 'Cathy Carson! Where are your leg warmers?') It was so ...

My mom's blueberry bushes were FULL of huge, ripe berries. I wish I had these at my house... The group photo from the reunion... there were an awful lot of bald men there! I bought this oilcloth bag at the Astoria Sunday Market. It makes me so happy. Costco trip today...

I'm so content right now. Eating blueberries I just picked off my mom's blueberry bush... Cup o' coffee. Great memories of a reunion that so far exceeded my expectations, I could almost cry. I had a blast. I'll post more tomorrow when I get home. I just had to check in and let you all know it wasn't a wallflower disaster. And I'm so happy to be from Astoria. Go, Class of '87! Woo-hoo!

I can't get him out from behind this book...

Seriously. There are all sorts of things I was planning to do with my kids this summer. And there's only five full weeks of summer left in which to do them. Not sure how that happens. I've been crazy busy this week... the kids have been at VBS - which they love. But I was mistakenly thinking that I would have a little extra time to accomplish some stuff while they were gone... instead I've been working a bunch and trying to get the laundry done so I can pack for my weekend and barely keeping the house clean. Agh! This week is a pretty clear example of how the summer is getting away from me. So here's my list. The things I want to do with the kids before school starts... Explore at least three new hiking trails together. Along with a cooler packed full of lunch and the dog. Go on a progressive fast food extravaganza. Drinks at Sonic. Burgers at D'Lish. Fries from Arby's. Ice cream cones from Dicks. My kids would think this was so silly and fun. Go to the river at...

I have never read a Harry Potter book. Nor do I ever plan to. Everyone in my family likes Harry Potter. But I don't. I don't want to talk about the new movie. Or the new book. So would every random stranger and friend and acquaintance and blog and home page and tv show please stop talking about it/him? Please? Sheesh. (I know. I'm a party pooper.)

Pizza for dinner. Gorgeous sky this morning...

Awake WAY too early this morning. Here's the deal with my hair. It's now long enough that I can feel it on my bare arms. It freaks me right out. I always think there's a spider on me or something. I'm not scared of spiders, but apparently I am scared of hair. It's been hot here again the last couple of days. Mid 90's. I'm not a fan of the 90's. Love the 80's. Speaking of the 80's, I'm heading home for my 20th class reunion this weekend. Of course, I wish I'd lost 10 pounds so I could be uber -fabulous, but all in all, I think I'm looking pretty good for 38. Still, I'm having lots of highschool-like anxieties about going alone. What if I'm still a wallflower at 38? Okay - I was never a wall-flower, but you know what I mean, right? My girlfriend Lisa had twins recently. I get to take her a meal tomorrow and see those sweet little babies. Can you even truly imagine what it must be like to take care of TWO newborns? Seriously. Th...

Peanutbutter toast with apples for breakfast. Yum! I have very happy feet in my new Nikes .

Savannah took this hilarious picture of Gracie...

Good news this week on the Tejan front. He'll be having his surgery at Shriner's on September 12th. Things are in motion to get his tickets and transportation arranged. He'll arrive here early enough to have a pre-op appointment. Not sure of the date on that, but I'm assuming it could be about a week before his surgery. It's so good to finally have a date. It makes it all feel real. We're very excited around here to see this answer to many months of prayers. And SO eager to meet our African son/brother. Can you even believe it's actually going to happen finally? Of course, now I'm nesting. Thinking of all the things I'd like to get done before his arrival. Silly. The timing really couldn't have been more perfect. I'd already asked for the weekend after the 12th off because I was thinking about going to the coast for a crop with my mom. So I'm totally free to be at the hospital... I think that's so cool. It's been over a year and...

Rod! For those of you who haven't picked up on this, Rod is the sweetest, most big-brotherly, generous chap. He sends me presents. Rod works at a used-book store for the Multnomah County library - and sends me and my family the greatest books from time to time. Isn't that just sweet? It only seems fitting that I choose him and return the good vibes. And plus, I love that I can totally envision him sitting there at his computer on Wednesday mornings, just waiting for the 'getting to know you' post. I was really tempted to choose my Dad (the golden graham-liking anonymous poster) and sweet Missy caught my eye this week, as well as Debbie and Andi. But I can only choose one. So this week, it's Rod. I know some of you are wondering, ' So if I send you presents in the mail does it increase my odds of being chosen on 'Getting to Know You Wednesday?' Hmmm. You may be onto something. Although, to be fair, there are plenty of times when I've chosen completel...

Ethan's new belly piercing.

So in today's little comment bribe-fest I have a little multiple choice quizzie for you. (Using the work quizzie reminds me of Mr. Seleski, my highschool math teacher, who, whenever he used that word had to point out that you could not add the same little cutsie ending to the word test without getting in trouble. But I digress.) So off we go... 1) You're in the cereal aisle at the grocery store. You buy: a) All bran. I'm all about fiber. b) Frosted Flakes. They're GRRRRREAT! c) Granola. Love me my granola. Especially on yogurt. d) Pop-Tarts, baby! 2) You get a $25 gift card to Barnes and Noble. You choose: a) A new CD right off the 'what's new' rack. You're a slave to the top 40. b) Coffee from the Starbucks shop. One a week for 6 weeks. c) The last Harry Potter book. d) Three books off the bargain book rack. 3) You wake up earlier than normal. You decide a) to go for a nice long walk and get your exercise for the day over with. b) you'll have to be ...

The sky outside my window last night.

I have officially finished my fall class schedule, which means I'm booked through December. Wow. It's challenging to think about Christmas projects when it's 90 degrees outside, but that's the nature of my job. We watched Two Towers last night. I was exhausted when it was over and totally aware that I am not a courageous person. I've started hanging some laundry out on my clothesline. This does a couple of things: it makes me feel like a real live housewife. And it makes me feel less guilt for running the air conditioner. Plus - nothing smells better than laundry that's been outside to dry. I love the library in the summer. The kids and I go and everyone finds their own little corner to read and hunt out treasures. It's cool in there. And there are really really a LOT of books there. And DVDs. And magazines. Gotta love the library. The kids go to VBS next week. They love it. I love the little midsummer break. Everyone's happy. We've smelled a skunk...

Savannah and her little buddy Rachel in the backyard pool.

I think maybe it's along the lines of 'if you don't have anyting nice to say...' I've been in a funk. And didn't want to spread the funkiness. So I've just been quiet. I'm getting over it. So here I am. ***** So let's see. What to talk about today... We got the Verizon bill. The first one since Kyler got his phone. And even though we thought we did everything to avoid that first awful bill where you discover your preteen has sent three billion text messages and you suddenly owe $1200 to your wireless carrier, we still had a little surprise on the bill. Seems that he's spent a bit of time browsing for ringtones. Like every day. Numerous times a day. Every couple of minutes in some cases. He didn't download any of them - just listened to the samples. But guess what? That eats up minutes. So we went over our allotted 'family plan' shared minutes. To the tune of $.45 a minute over. $127.00 in overages. I hardly use my cell phone. My min...

Savannah working on her summer homework packet. Homework in the summer, you ask? Yes - it's a voluntary packet - the kids who complete it get to go to a pizza lunch after school starts back up. Sneaky teachers...

Gracie got a new toy to replace her old one because she ate the feet off the last one because she loved it so much... This is where we spent the day... pure bliss in the 100 degree weather.

It's ugly. But it makes it 74 degrees in my house instead of 84. So I LOVE it. Ugly and all.

My seven year old just came upstairs (they all sleep downstairs when it's hot) and laid down on his back on the couch and said, "Mom, I'm in professional therapy and you're the therapist, s o ask me professional therapist questions."

I'm not a huge fan of summer. I've always known it in the back of my mind. But have never said it out loud. Here's one reason why: I don't like HOT weather. And it gets pretty hot here in the summer. Especially this week. It's supposed to be over 100 degrees for the next three days in a row. And it's already been in the 90's all week long. And it's not supposed to cool down to the high 80's until next Wednesday. (Sidenote: I lived in Fresno during the summer of 1988. And that summer we had something like 20 days in a row over 95 degrees. Wow. That was a killer. I lived in a house with no air conditioning. We had a swamp cooler and lots of mice in that house. It was hellish. I was not a happy camper. But perhaps that's another story for another day.) My sweet husband, bless him, bought me a window unit air conditioner for our living room. It helps. A bit. Poor thing is pumping like crazy and I'm afraid to see the power bill when it comes. But...

Because I love my sister-in-law Lorraine, and because she asked, here's all you might ever want to know about edamame. Edamame.com There you go. I buy a big frozen bag at Costco. Once you let them thaw (for a couple of hours on the counter) you can shell them (they pop right out) and put a little garlic salt on them for a very filling snack. They're full of fiber. And soy protein, of course. They have a firm texture and a very mild taste. I just love them.

The kids and I went to the Farmer's Market today. I love the Farmer's Market.

Lovin' edamame. Have you ever seen a prettier green? Gracie got new bowls. Nice big bowls so I don't have to refill her water dish ten times a day...

My family was gone all weekend. Asia took them up to a friends' cabin, and since I had to work on Friday, and we didn't want to kennel the dog, I stayed home. The whole house to myself for almost 48 hours. That's a long time to not have anyone else to talk to. So I did some thinking. Quite a bit, actually. And here's what I think. I think I'm going through some sort of a mid-life thingy. I won't call it a crisis. Because it's not. But there are definitely thoughts running through my mind that are disconcerting. And annoying. And I pretty much want them to go away. Thoughts like 'is this all there is? ' and 'what have I done with my life? ' and 'what else could I have done? ' and 'I'm such a loser because I haven't moved to Africa .' I think some of those questions can be good. But when they start to mess with contentment, then they become bad. Because I want to be content. I'm just wanting something more. More chal...

A very bad picture of my newly weeded and mulched flower bed. Yay!

Swimming today at Lake Roosevelt.

Sorry it took me a couple of days to get this written. The winner of 'getting to know you Wednesday' this week is M & F Mom. (Sorry I don't know your real name!) Comment here for me and let me know what kind of cards you want. I'll make them 'specially for you and pop them in the post next week. Oh - and I'll need your email so I can get your addy. Congrats! And thanks to everyone for playing. It was good to hear that so many of you really don't feel the need for a do-over. And those of you who did want one, it was neat to hear that you spoke without regret - and instead you recognized that all your choices led up to who you are today... My do-over? It would be more travel. Much like Corey - who wished she had travelled more in her 20's. I was just afraid, I think, when I was young. And so I didn't dream very big. But I don't regret anything. It just would have been a lot easier to see the world then than it is now! Happy weekend, friends.

Cereal for dinner - too hot to cook. Not sure why his nose is flared like that... silly picture. Thirsty dog.

The days are hot. And long. And I'm bored. That's all.

Yay for America!

So today we're going to talk about do-overs. I was inspired by Susie, who wrote a whole blog post about do-overs this week. If the magic do-over fairy came and visited you and granted you one do-over for your life, what would you do? Would you go back to college and change your major? Would you take back your first kiss? How about going back to high school and being nicer to the lonely kids? Would you choose to have children later than you did? Maybe you'd have travelled more. Or partied less. Or invested earlier. You get one do-over. What's it going to be? As always, I'll choose a commenter (randomly this week) and send you a goody. This week it's a set of 4 handmade cards. A custom order - just for you. Have birthdays coming up that you need cards for? I'll make and send you four birthday cards. Babies popping out everywhere you look? We can do baby cards. How about just some blank, generic 'thinking of you' sorts? Sure thing. Whatever you want - I...

The shameful state of my front flower bed. {Shown only so we can all appreciate the 'after' shot I'll take tomorrow after I've weeded.}

Blogging from work seems so scandalous. But I can whip out a Tuesday Ten between customers and when I need to rest my legs for a minute, right? And besides, I have to check the online shop anyway for orders. That's why I'm online, people. New product coming out soon with the CHA Summer trade show. We're seeing sneak peeks every day. It's a killer. I'm dying for the new Scenic Route. Be still my heart - I love paper. I make an awful lot of banana baked goods. This is because I love bananas, but only if they're not green at all . Three or four brown spots makes a perfect banana, in my book. Problem is, bananas stay in that state for roughly three minutes, and then the whole bunch goes bad - too ripe for even my taste. So I make banana bread. And muffins. Yesterday it was a cake. Yum. I think I need to just buy two bananas at a time or something silly like that - then I could eat them all before they were all brown and mushy. I found big bags of bark mulch on sale...

Kyler sold these on ebay today for $172.50. Sheesh.

I chose this photo today because I've never considered myself athletic. And when I do something athletic, I want to celebrate it and say "this is who I am" even though I feel like I'm faking it. Does that make sense to anyone but me?

We skipped church this morning. Sometimes we just need a family day. Asia and I started the day with walking the dog and a stop at Starbucks. Love being with him. (Asia, not the dog. Although I like her too.) Then we loaded all our bikes into a friends' truck and drove down to Centennial trail, where we rode and rode and rode. Perfect weather. Perfect scenery. A lovely ride. Until Asia popped a tire. Then it became a lovely walk/ride/wait for Dad to catch up. We came home and a gal I'm mentoring came over for a walk. We walked. And talked. Good. Then Asia and I dove into fixing our dead front lawn. Broke up the soil. Added new seed. Worked our little tails off. And after a shower and dinner, which Savannah helped me make, we're sitting in front of The Guardian. It was a great day. I'm tired. But it's a good tired. Gotta love a good tired.